Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.
It’s Oh-Dark-Thirty, and I am up and moving. I put on my birthday suit and discovered it really needed pressing; too many wrinkles!
I heard little footsteps in the guest bedroom, and I thought it must be an Elf. It turned out to be Irene who stayed the night so we could drive her to the airport at 6:30 AM. I am up on my birthday at 5:00 AM; oh dear!
I made it to the airport!
When I returned from the airport, Mary asked me how it went. I said, “Except for not having my glasses, swell” Then she pointed out I had them tucked onto my sweatshirt collar; I did not remember they were there; it’s tough getting old. Finding the airport using Braille was not as easy as it might seem!
Mary: “You have five bottles in one hand and six in the other hand. Do you know ow what you have?”
Me: “A drinking problem.”
I stayed ” dry ” all day with all the driving I had to do,
We worked around the house, and Colleen did some errands. We got ready for Girls Night Out at the Elks, and the rest of the day was a blur; we partied until we pooped out!
I got a free drink at the Elks, honoring that I could stand upright at my age and in my condition! 77 is a transitional age I have discovered.
A “transitional age” is when you don’t know what you want – ice cream or beer during a hot day.
I was deluged with cakes at the luncheon!
Most of the gang are here!
OK, one down two to go! We did stop by Trader Joe’s and a Christmas Store before heading home to check on Scout. We don’t like to be gone too long because he gets bored and calls up the neighbor dogs for a party!
I like wine so much that my family and friends didn’t know I drank until they saw me sober once!
At 5:00 PM, it was time to rocket down the 55-Freeway to Santa Ana for the annual Packard Christmas Party. We love it as Colleen is getting to meet all of our friends, and we are proud of her.
Colleen has a couple of West Coast guy friends; Jay and Cal (they are both in their 80’s but appreciate fine cars and fine women!) I overheard Colleen talking to them. She told them, “A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.”
The Packard party was terrific; we dined and visited and had a wonderful time!
Colleen and I were tired already so we leaned against the bar.
I tink I had tee many martoonies!!
Our tummies are full of Mexican food, so we are gassed up and ready to move on. As I entered the car, I heard, “To the next party, Jeeves,” and the girls got into the back seat of my car. Thank goodness I did not have my chauffer’s hat in the car. I did have to make one stop before the PNI Party; I stopped at Staples.
“Your finest Scotch, please.”
“Yes, sir,” the guy at Staples says as he hands me a 12-year-old roll of tape.
So we are now in Irvine at the Irvine City Community Center Complex, which I liked because I knew there would be no alcohol allowed. We talked a lot about our children on our way, and I happened to mention that raising children takes a village, preferably one with many vineyards.
I do NOT drink and drive because I might spill the drink.
We arrived, and everyone was happy to see Mary. It was her last official visit to the group. Professional Networking with Integrity was formed to allow members to network with fellow professionals and generate leads for their businesses through referrals. Each member is expected to support each other’s business by actively looking for potential clients for each other.
Mary was honored for her part in making PNI a success!
On the way home, I reminded the ladies, “The speed of light is when you take a bottle of wine out of the fridge before the light comes on.”
We made it home safely and lasted about 13 seconds before we crashed! I remember turning on a Christmas movie, but alas, I have no idea what it was.
At 11:00 PM, Mary woke me up; she could not find Scout. We looked everywhere, and I searched the wet backyard in my stocking feet. We returned to the house to wake up Colleen and have her join in the hunt, and guess what, there was Scout up on her bed with a big smile on his face. He found a sleeping spot.
Scout has a funny sense of humor because he told us a definition. Dachshund: An animal half a dog high by a dog and a half long.
