Thoughts For 2006
Number 10 - Life is
sexually transmitted.
Number 9 - Good
health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8 - Men have
two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection,
make him a sandwich.
Number 7 - Give a
person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the
Internet and they don't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 - Some
people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Number 5 - Health
nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of
nothing.
Number 4 - All of us
could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
Number 3 - Why does a
slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial
tax cut saves you thirty cents?
Number 2 - In the
60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1
THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with
mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows
in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of
illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put
the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.