Zee Gas Ese Impor-Tant!

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts!

How To Get Gas (Laugh And Learn)

A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre.

The Louvre

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van.

However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied,
"Monsieur that is the reason I stole the paintings...."

"I had no Monet

Monet
Claude Oscar Monet (November 14, 1840 Ð December 5, 1926)

  Claude Monet (French pronounced [klod m?n?]) also known as Oscar-Claude Monet or Claude Oscar Monet (November 14, 1840 Ð December 5, 1926) was a founder of French impressionist painting, and the most consistent and prolific practitioner of the movement's philosophy of expressing one's perceptions before nature, especially as applied to plein-air landscape painting.

When Monet traveled to Paris to visit The Louvre, he witnessed painters copying from the old masters. Monet, having brought his paints and other tools with him, would instead go and sit by a window and paint what he saw. Monet was in Paris for several years and met several painters who would become friends and fellow impressionists. One of those friends was ƒdouard Manet.

In June of 1861 Monet joined the First Regiment of African Light Cavalry in Algeria for two years of a seven-year commitment, but upon his contracting typhoid his aunt Marie-Jeanne Lecadre intervened to get him out of the army if he agreed to complete an art course at a university. It is possible that the Dutch painter Johan Barthold Jongkind, whom Monet knew, may have prompted his aunt on this matter.

to buy Degas

Degas
Edgar Degas (19 July 1834 Ð 27 September 1917)

Edgar Degas (19 July 1834 Ð 27 September 1917), born Hilaire-Germain-Edgar Degas, was a French artist famous for his work in painting, sculpture, printmaking and drawing.

He is regarded as one of the founders of Impressionism although he rejected the term, and preferred to be called a realist. A superb draughtsman, he is especially identified with the subject of the dance, and over half his works depict dancers. These display his mastery in the depiction of movement, as do his racecourse subjects and female nudes. His portraits are considered to be among the finest in the history of art.

Degas began to paint seriously early in his life. By eighteen he had turned a room in his home into an artist's studio, and had begun making copies in the Louvre, but his father expected him to go to law school.

Degas duly registered at the Faculty of Law of the University of Paris in November 1853, but made little effort at his studies there. In 1855, Degas met Jean Auguste Dominique Ingres and was advised by him to "draw lines, young man, many lines.

to make the Van Gogh"

Van Gogh
Vincent Willem van Gogh (30 March 1853 Ð 29 July 1890)

Vincent Willem van Gogh (30 March 1853 Ð 29 July 1890) was a Dutch Post-Impressionist artist. His paintings and drawings include some of the world's best known, most popular and most expensive pieces.

Van Gogh spent his early adult life working for a firm of art dealers. After a brief spell as a teacher, he became a missionary worker in a very poor mining region.

He did not embark upon a career as an artist until 1880. Initially, van Gogh worked only with sombre colours, until he encountered Impressionism and Neo-Impressionism in Paris.

He incorporated their brighter colours and style of painting into a uniquely recognizable style, which was fully developed during the time he spent at Arles, France. He produced more than 2,000 works, including around 900 paintings and 1,100 drawings and sketches, during the last ten years of his life.

See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else.

DeGaulle
Charles AndrŽ Joseph Marie de Gaulle
(November 22, 1890 Ð November 9, 1970)

Charles Joseph Marie de Gaulle (November 22, 1890) November 9, 1970) was a French general and statesman who led the Free French Forces during World War II and later founded the French Fifth Republic and served as its first President. In France, he is commonly referred to as General de Gaulle or simply Le General, or familiarly as "le Grand Charles".

A veteran of World War I, in the 1920s and 1930s de Gaulle came to the fore as a proponent of armoured warfare and advocate of military aviation, which he considered resolutive means to break the stalemate of trench warfare.

During World War II, he reached the rank of Brigadier General, leading one of the few successful armored counter-attacks during the 1940 Fall of France and organized the Free French Forces with exiled French officers in England.

He gave a famous radio address in 1940, exhorting the French people to resist Nazi Germany. Following the liberation of France in 1944, de Gaulle became prime minister in the French Provisional Government.

I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.

Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
(24 November 1864, 9 September 1901)

Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec (24 November 1864 Ð 9 September 1901) was a French painter, printmaker, draftsman, and illustrator, whose immersion in the decadent and theatrical life in Paris yielded an oeuvre of provocative images of modern life.

Physically unable to participate in most of the activities typically enjoyed by men of his age, Toulouse-Lautrec immersed himself in his art.

He became an important Post-Impressionist painter, art nouveau illustrator, and lithographer; and recorded in his works many details of the late-19th-century bohemian lifestyle in Paris. Toulouse-Lautrec also contributed a number of illustrations to the magazine Le Rire during the mid-1890s.

Throughout his career, which spanned less than 20 years, Toulouse-Lautrec created 737 canvases, 275 watercolors, 363 prints and posters, 5,084 drawings, some ceramic and stained glass work, and an unknown number of lost works.

Toulouse-Lautrec is known along with Cezanne, Van Gogh, and Gaugin as one of the greatest painters of the Post-Impressionist period.