Nerds Are People Too
Test Scoring: Each question is in two parts. If you answer YES to the first part, give yourself one point. If the answer to the second part is also YES, give yourself another 2 points. The total number of points determines your percentage of nerdiness, up to 100%. You already have a head start of one point for reading this far. If you stop now without taking the test, add 99 points.
- Has anyone ever called you a nerd? Did you take it as a compliment?
- Have you ever taken a course in statistics or calculus? As an elective?
- Do people ask you for definitions or synonyms for words? Even when they have a dictionary or thesaurus within reach?
- Do you (or did you) sit in the front row at school most of the time? And arrive early to get the best seat?
- Have you ever used a "system" for taking class notes? Did you create this "system" yourself?
- Were you tormented in high school (stuffed in a toilet, made to wear "kick me" signs, etc.) by the jocks? By the other nerds?
- Do you know Avogadro's number? Did you ever put it on the back of your athletic shirt thinking it would be funny?
- Do you use the computer for four hours or more every day? Even on the weekends?
- Do you prefer computers to humans? Including the person with whom you are having an intimate relationship?
- Did the phrase "intimate relationship" make you blush? Or did you wonder what qualifies as an "intimate relationship?"
- Have you ever owned a Star Trek gizmo (tricorder, fake ears, ship model, etc.)? And a uniform?
- Can you outline the plot of six or more Star Trek episodes? Do you ever come up with alternatives because, in your opinion, "Spock would never say that"?
- Have you ever taken Latin? Do you enjoy using it in everyday conversation?
- Have you ever told a joke about chemistry or physics? Did most or all of your friends get it?
- Do you attend parties where most of the guests have advanced science degrees? Do you host them?
- Have you ever analyzed a fake food (Twinkies, Cheez Whiz, etc.) for chemical content? And then eaten it?
- Do you have a pet ferret, iguana, alligator, tarantula, or snake? Did you name your pet after a Nobel laureate?
- Have you played Dungeons and Dragons in the last year? With the same people you've played with for 2 years or more?
- Can you convert fahrenheit to centigrade in your head? Do you find yourself doing so unconsciously?
- Is your SAT math score 600 or more? It is higher than your SAT verbal score?
- Do you own a T-shirt with a picture of Einstein on it? Do you wear it with a suit?
- Do you wear button dwn shirts with the tails out? Over shorts?
- Do you wear glasses? Do they change color outdoors?
- Do you have slide rule? And know how to use it?
- Do you know what a font is? Do you know what font you are reading now?
- Have you ever owned a chemistry set? Since the age of 12?
- Have you ever browsed at Radio Shack? On a date?
- Do you wear a digital watch? With a built-in calculator?
- Have you ever read the dictionary or encyclopedia for fun? Cover to cover?
- Do you play chess? You you read books about chess?
- Do you own a pocket protector? Are you wearing it now?
- Do you have friends in the internet? Are they your best friends?
- Is your IQ: a) greater then your weight, or b) constant to your weight in the same ratio as your eyeglass prescription over pi? Did you actually try, even for just a momet, to calculate the answer to that question?